Alli, the newly FDA approved diet pill, is an over the counter version of the prescription-only weight-loss medicine, Xenical, that has been available for several years. Having previously heard of Xenical, I became interested and visited the alli website. While going through their on-line test to see if “I was ready for the alli plan,” I found pictures of greasy burgers, fatty foods, and even donuts, followed by a picture of the bathroom. The web-site has daily regiments you must stick to for losing weight, such as physical exercise, eating healthier and reducing fat in your diet. Why are they showing me pictures of hamburgers and donuts, are those the diet foods that the company is referring to? The other question is that if I were to exercise and reduce the amount of my fat consumption, I would lose weight anyway, why do I need this miracle pill?
Alli’s web-site also doesn’t list any side-effects, they are called “treatment effects.” These treatment effects don’t seem to be so bad, if you enjoy shitting oily liquid in your pants. The maker of alli (Glaxo SmithKline) says that in addition to having loose stool, the oily liquid will look like the “oil on top of a pizza.” The company suggests that when starting the treatment to stay at home, (so you're near your toilet). The company also suggests that if you have to go to work you will need a change of clothes, and to also wear dark clothes, (probably the oily stool will stain your clothes).
I won't go into how the drug works other than to say it's a fat absorber and is supposed to absorb whatever fat intake you might ingest whilst on a very very low-fat diet. What amazes me is that people actually buy this stuff even with all the warnings and horror stories that float around.
I have a story about the Xenical pills when they first came out. I have a close friend that was prescribed these pills for weight loss. He is a typical single guy, trying to lose a few vanity pounds and figured this was a great pill to try. I personally didn’t think he needed these pills. He had been on the pills for a few days and all was well, he was sticking to the diet of very little to no fat consumption as advised by his doctor.
My friend had been pursuing this hot, blonde chic, (his words not mine), and she had finally agreed to go to a Madonna concert with him. Now, this poor guy was even more determined to lose weight so he took a pill before the date.
The date was going along fine, he picked her up and they arrived at the concert. Everyone knows how tempting concert food is. It’s all cheeseburgers, cheese fries, hot dogs, and fried dough. What’s a diet without a little cheating. After chowing down on some cheese fries, and let’s not forget the fried elephant ear, he started experiencing some mild gas. This mild gas, started to get worse, to the point where he couldn’t blame the people sitting around them. My friend had to make several bathroom trips at the concert, until they finally had to leave. During the car ride, dropping the date off, my friend was experiencing terrible gas. And finally my friend couldn’t hold it any more and he let the gas flow without trying to hold it in any longer and let the large amount of gas flow naturally. When he got home he told me how the back of his pants and the seat of his leather car (a nice, new Audi TT convertible) were covered in a thick layer of shit grease / oil. He had no idea it was happening. He can't remember if he smelled it at the time or not because of his non stop flatulence. He also was unsure of when the grease had started to flow (in the car or at the concert). Anyways, it was a one time only date and he lost his 10lbs by doing the Atkins diet for a couple of weeks and threw the Xenical in the garbage. He says it was one of the most embarrasing moments of his life and never got the courage to call his date after that night.
Consider what you might actually happen to you by using this drug!